Here is, I think, a good and reasonable summary of the anti-feminist perspective: (Haley's Halo via Anna)
[Society] today tends to view men as morally inferior to women and that men must work hard to remain in women’s good graces. This is a byproduct of the wider cultural acceptance of feminist ideology, in which women’s imperatives are good while men’s are bad and need to be corrected to be more like women’s. Men are taught that they need to be more sacrificial, more humble, more romantic, more supportive, and more understanding of women. They need to be better listeners. They need to man up. They need to step up to the plate. They need to stop playing video games. They need to apologize more. They need to be friends first. They need to see women’s inner beauty. They need to not judge women for their sexual history.
Meanwhile, women are precious daughters of the King who deserve to be loved for who they are!
In summary, men are unfairly expected to be more like women. Women need to stop being such royal jerks!
Not that I disagree, but... well, okay, I disagree. I hereby declare myself an anti-anti-feminist. (Which is different from calling myself a feminist; I’m not that either.) What it comes down to is this: Why are those cultural expectations there? Is it because a tribe of mean females somehow obtained power and now are dictating cultural expectations to the masses based on their own selfish interest? (I’ve got my eye on you, Hillary.)
I actually buy a lot of the anti-feminist rhetoric that there is somewhat of a cultural expectation that men become more lady-like in certain ways, and that men, perhaps more than women, are expected to put the woman’s needs and desires and safety ahead of their own.
Here’s what I don’t buy: This sucks – More Equality!
If this is persecution, then I don’t mind it. I actually kind of prefer it. I want to put a woman’s needs and wants and safety to some extent ahead of my own. Maybe it’s some relic from the savannah that no longer applies to a modern society where all women are royal jerks, but it’s there nonetheless, and I don’t see any reason why we should try to smoosh all cultural expectations into Perfect Equality. I don’t even see any evidence that cultural expectations can be smooshed.
(But I’ve still got my eye on you, Hillary.)
###
Back when I was doing online dating, there were a lot of women who were sporting feminism on their profiles not just as part of their identity but seemingly as a screening criterion, as in, “This Is Who I Am—can you handle it?”
I found that pretty funny, because it was stated as if I should care, as if this intellectual conviction of theirs was in some crucial way going to affect the way we feel about each other or our ability to inhabit the same living room.
The thing is, it really doesn’t bother me whether you believe that men and women should be treated exactly equally, or whether you believe that all animals should be freed from zoos, or whether you believe that all bacon should be served with a healthy serving of butter. It tells me very little other than that you have some convictions that you’ve latched onto. That in itself is a mark against you more than any particular belief you purport to hold.
